Is taking psychiatric medication a sign of weakness?

Psychiatric medications are a hassle. They can be extremely difficult to get a hold of, they can be ridiculously expensive even with health insurance, and we’re all too familiar with the debilitating side effects. Some can get you addicted, some can cause permanent damage to the body.

Most of the time we take the medications for ourselves, to get back on track when we aren’t feeling how we know we should. Sometimes we take them to appease other people in our lives or because we’re ordered to to make us fitting into our roles as human beings a little easier for those around us, and hopefully ourselves in the long run. Medication can be used as a crutch to get through a difficult time or it can be a necessary part of your wellness regimen for the rest of your life.

The goal of psychiatry is to minimize symptoms with the least amount of discomfort as possible. It’s a bargaining game where you trade your natural struggles for some drug-induced problems. You keep trying until you find the combination that makes it all worth it. That can take years, thousands of dollars, and what seems like all the strength you can muster.

I’m not saying these things to deter people from finding the right medication for them. On the contrary, I want the general population to know that we’re willing to walk through fire for a chance at being okay. This isn’t some half-assed decision that we make because we’re too lazy to fix our lives, this is us determining that this is the help our body needs most, which we are willing to accept despite the physical and societal repercussions.

It takes a tremendous amount of strength, honesty, and self-accountability to decide to allow the help of medications. Not every problem can be solved on our own, or even with the help of others. Sometimes the only thing left to blame is brain chemistry, and that is no one’s fault.

Playing trial and error with different medications teaches you things about yourself that you never thought you’d learn. You have to know your body well enough to take notice of the smallest changes. You have to unravel your emotions and find the root of problems that you thought would be a part of you for life, but you now have the strength to change.

Most importantly, taking medications is a commitment. We keep the pledge to honor our health every day when we take our meds. Our health, happiness, and overall well being are things that we deserve to have in top-condition, no matter what it takes to get there.

Some might argue that you are no longer yourself under the influence of medications. And to that I politely say, fuck off. I’ve been mentally ill for most of my life. My illnesses are ingrained in every aspect of my being. They define some of the core traits of my personality and give me struggles that I can’t always hide from everyone in my life. That, under no circumstances, means that my illnesses are all there is to me. The gift that medication gives is the ability to turn down the “bad” parts so the good parts can shine through. Continuing the narrative that healing alters your sense of self in an undesirable or dishonest way is so insidiously harmful. Healing is growth, and growth means change. And any change that is for the better should be accepted with open arms.

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